Eternal Quotes from one of my favorite episodes!

SpongeBob: I am just so touched that you would go to the trouble to dress up as a ghostly fry-cook and stand on the other side of the street just to entertain me. You must really like me!

Squidward: Spongebob, there are two problems with your theory. One, I hate you. And two, how can that be me when I'm standing right here?

Or you could go with....

Squidward: Years ago, at this very restaurant, the hash-slinging slasher used to be a frycook, just like you. Only clumsier! And then, one night, when he was cutting the patties, it happened...

SpongeBob: He forgot the secret sauce?

Squidward: No.

SpongeBob: He didn't wash his hands?

Squidward: No!

SpongeBob: Irregular portions?

Squidward: NO! He cut off his own hand! By mistake!

SpongeBob: You mean like this?

[At every 'this', SpongeBob removes his arm and a new one grows back] SpongeBob: Or like this? Or this? Or this? But what about this? Or this? Or this? Or this?

Squidward: Except he wasn't a sponge!

SpongeBob: So?

Squidward: So it didn't grow back!

SpongeBob: OH NO!

Squidward: And he replaced his hand... with a rusty spatula. And then... he got hit by a bus! And, as funeral, they fired him! So now... every... What day is it?

SpongeBob: Tuesday.

Squidward: Tuesday night! His ghost returns to the Krusty Krab to wreak his horrible vengeance!